I think we’re in for a real treat here folks. Let’s take a look at this picture for a second. Now tell me this shouldn’t be the 100% unequivocally number one choice for FSU’s Homepage. Instead it’s some putzy brown hair guy with a 4.0 GPA. Yay for you buddy! You know what I think of when I see this picture? The first day of school and the parents dropping their kids off. I’ll never forget when I was a sophomore and our fraternity put up a giant sign that said “SAE Welcomes Your Daughters!” Imagine being a father and seeing this group of girls standing at the gates to this school? A. You have to realize how hot they are and somehow hide that amazement from your wife and B. You have to realize that your daughter is that hot and pricks with “welcomes your daughters” signs are going to be fucking her.

Yup ladies. Whatever position works. Not one, not a single one of these girls has a body that would qualify as less than an 8. Probably no less than a 9 if I were five beers in. Not to mention every single one of these girls has gotten and will continue to get pissed drunk during this entire semester. Not to mention one of these girls even happens to be a Golden Key and Phi Beta Sigma member. No matter. I mean, if you’re me and you’re in your late 20’s, hell 50’s your heart is eternally breaking right now. Oh how I miss the days. Guess what guys? Those days will NEVER come back. The closest thing we have are bachelor parties.

Just so you all know I’ve done four things in the past five minutes. First of all, I’ve jerked off twice. The third thing I’ve done is email each of my fraternity brothers in my pledge class. I’ve sent them these pictures and wrote, “don’t you miss college?” I’ve already received three “fuck you’s” and a “I hate you.” The fourth thing I’ve done is tie up a noose for my death.

More Pictures: I promise you these are excellent. Be careful though, there’s a shitload of douchebaggishnish from the guys. P.S. These guys get to fuck these girls. Man does that suck

Title of this photo album submitted by Jillk144? “Who the hell wouldn’t join this sorority?” Well Jill. You certainly have my vote. Whoever the girl on the left is…I just hope some dude did exactly what I’d do. Get her as drunk as is humanly possible. Take her home. Put her to sleep and explain to her friends that someone got her way too drunk and that I took care of her. Did I actually do this? Your damned right I did. I pulled this maneuver off at college some years back (way back). The problem was that I was at a girl’s formal and she was kind of gross. The real ending to that night was me hooking up with a freshman but still looking good for taking this girl back to her apartment and laying her down to sleep safely. She sort of liked me for a week and I didn’t like that.

Now it’s the girl in the white dress. Jesus Vanderbilt! What the hell? Kappa Delta huh? I can’t imagine what these girls do to their pledges. If I had to guess? Gloryholing the frat boys and letting the ladies suck some chrome. I never really did see too much hazing with the sororities at my school. I guess us having to eat shit, lay in garbage and get the ever living shit kicked out of us probably made up for the non abuse the ladies incurred.

Funnest girl to bang in this group? Come on guys, if we’re not on the same page here then I just give up. Easily the smoker in the jean shorts. So dirty. So great. Every school has one of her. At my school? It was a girl we nick named Dirty Jen. She was actually kind of hot as a freshman and everyone tried to get in on that while she was attractive. I caught her on the back end. She was just starting to gain weight. Girl told me I could “put it anywhere” and spoke French to me while I was passed out.

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And here are the (as you can see from their sign) wonderful Gammas of Villanova. Well at least they were wonderful back in 2005, which is when these pictures were taken. I doubt they look so wonderful right now. Let’s just hope that some of them still do. This sorority is what I consider to be a blended sorority. Typical party sorority where the girls seem to be very close, drink a ton but overall aren’t that hot. However, there are clearly 5 or 6 girls that easily could have been in other hotter sororities but opted to join the one that would create the longest lasting friendships!

Middle girl? Leader and token hot girl of the group. Other girls? I think I’m 100% accurate in saying that the girl on the right will be a bonafide cougar in her elder years. She’s the type that you’ll see at a Yankees game in a Yankees hat with two of her other single, in their late 30’s friends. They’ll be drinking and making a scene. I’d laugh but still accept blow jobs from all three when offered.

Yes. I like this. I like that neither are incredibly hot but that both are the perfect candidates for the “drunk hookup and complete revealing of all details story the day after it all happened.” Girl on the right is the one who posted all of these pictures in a wonderful album on Webshots.

So much fun. So much fucking fun. Could you even imagine having an actual relationship with one of these Gamma’s? Actually I can. In college this would have been perfect. I would definitely just try and move from one to the next. Then, the girls would find out I’d been banging all of them. They’d get pissed but in actuality it’s nothing a little alcohol and sweet talking couldn’t handle. College was amazing and I’ll never be back there. Holy shit I’m a total fucking hump now. So be it.

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And why not have the girl with the nicest body and bangability factor be right square in the middle? Excellent job Alphas. This is one of those sororities that in my humble opinion has it all. You see I went to somewhat of a prissy school where the hot sorority girls knew they were hot, and that bothered me. Why? Because most were very snotty or clicky. These girls? They look to be very hot, very fun, and probably even nice. Why? They’re in San Diego, are hot, are in college and what the fuck do they have to be worried about? Might as well be nice.

This definitely reminds me of “Van Wilder” and the custard treats scene. I swear to God almost nothing grosses me out in terms of me getting nauseous from actually seeing something, but that scene literally made me cough up chunks. Surprisingly this picture doesn’t turn me on all that much. Weird because I’m a giant fan of Bukkake films.

Pink might be my new favorite color. Oh and I haven’t mentioned how unbelievably sexy socks up to the knees on a girl is. On a guy it’s pretty faggy. How much would you pay to go back to college and be at a mixer with this sorority? I think if I had $25,000 to my name I would probably relinquish somewhere around 20 of it.

Come on Alpha Phi’s! What a picture.

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Yes I’m completely aware that Sigma Phi Epsilon is a fraternity but you can’t tell me that these aren’t sorority girls now can you? Come on. We all know that these frat mixers contain some little sisters right? The boys at Alabama know how to throw a party or at least the photos make it look that way. Fly By Radio with another assist on these photos. Excellent marketing of this party the way. I must give kudos to the Sig Ep Rush Chair on this one. Sig Ep’s at my school were most certainly a bunch of toolboxes but these guys seem to have their shit together. Notice a few things. First off, the size of the cup in that girl’s hand is perfect. No chance if that’s a mixed drink that the majority of girls there can handle even one. You know they’re all being forced to have at least 4. Secondly, it’s a pink cup so now all the girls can go around wasted saying “I love these pink cups!” Finally, the guy are completely taking advantage of these girls later on which is the fraternity way. Tuscaloosa, I applaud you for doing this right.

This girl would be the ultimate prime suspect. She definitely looks like a Lauren or an Ashley. Zero chance she hasn’t hooked up with at least two dudes at this party. But you know something? I LOVE chicks like this. Excellent for dating for about 2 months before moving on but still calling her for the occasional drunk pop. Ok, I know nothing about this girl and I’m sure she’s really nice

Did daddy pay for those sweetheart? You see that’s the thing with girls under 22 getting boob jobs. Their PARENTS pay for this stuff. Hi dad? Can you give me ten grand for an operation that will make guys want to fuck me more? Sure honey. You know that Tuscaloosa Sig Ep is loving the fact that this picture got posted. And so am I. And I’m sure the million readers know it to (if I had a million readers).

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These photos were taken back in 2005 and are courtesy of the Spankietwins. Our little princess is donning the red dress on the bottom. You know it’d be nice if the Sigma Chi ladies would babysit, even watch poor little Bianca on her 21st. But it’s apparent that in the greek life, those things simply don’t happen. And we wonder why there’s so many instances of guys taking advantage of girls.

Um. I’m kind of speechless here. I think Sigma Chi has just topped my list of favorite sororities. I take back everything I said in the first picture. Bianca, you’re the queen baby. Can you believe people post this stuff on picture sharing websites?

This guy is such a scumbag but A. I like him and B. I’m jealous.

This guy. I repeat THIS guy has as legitimate a shot as any guy at that entire club to suck those breastesses. Incredible. The funny thing is, being close to 30 years old I realize that obtaining a girl like that really isn’t all that difficult and yet I’d KILL to be there just one more time. Life has a sick way of working. Photos presented by Fly By Radio. What a great find by me.

Hooking up with the girl in the green: not that difficult and something that one would do if after consumption of a full bottle of Beam.

Hooking up with the girl on the right: a challenge due to other guys hitting on her but attainable if in the right situation.

Watching guy in Red Hat hook up with girl on right: Priceless

Holy shitballs. Please insert commentary for this guy. I have no words. I have nothing.